How does it feel?

Oh the irony! The indignity of the American macho alt-right little boys, the outrage at their being told what to do with their bodies, is so thick it can be felt all the way to England! And it is in those very American states, the ones that were most extreme in their criminalization of women’s bodies in the name of conservative male power, where that indignity is at its whiniest and thickest.

So how does it feel to be on your own, powerless, helpless, unnecessary — impotent? You don’t like it when staying at home for a month or two is for a good and noble cause, do you, irrespective of the economic impact? Are you starting to get an idea about how it must be for a woman to have her entire life uprooted, to have to effectively stay at home for nine months, not for the common welfare, but at the whim of a bunch of old, white guys? Never mind that she will then have to stay at home for the next eighteen years or so, to be simultaneously discounted and slut-shamed because you have robbed her of her right to choose, and criminalized if she tries to assert that right. At least you get a stimulus check and a pat on the back when this is all over. She wouldn’t even get maternity leave if you could have it your way. Do you see the connection?

I doubt it, because seeing patterns where they actually exist was never your strong suit. You’re better at seeing patterns where none exist, or where they exist in some bizarre fantasy of your own making. Like the idea that God is somehow on the side of Republicans, that he hates the poor and the needy, even when it says the exact opposite in that big black book you’re always thumping, even though you are among the poor and needy. That’s the same book that says absolutely nothing about voluntary abortion, by the way. Funny how that’s become your pet peeve. But then, you’ve been told to make it your pet peeve and when the commandment is handed down by your actual god, from white, male Republican authorities, you always do what you’re told.

I’ll bet you’d be shocked — SHOCKED! — at how many abortions your big white leader, the child-raping, American-murdering Donald Trump has paid for. Eight is the number, I believe. Of course, he made all eight of those women sign non disclosure agreements, so I guess we’ll never know for sure.

Meanwhile, Trump agrees with you. He wants you to get back out there and get back to work. That way his precious stock market will be revived, the very stock market that you couldn’t afford to buy a single share of a single blue chip stock in. If you should contract coronavirus and die as a result, well, that’s a price he’s more than happy to pay. Oh the sacrifices that man is willing to make!

No wonder he’s telling you, on the one hand, to stay at home like a good little boy in his official guidelines, and on the other he’s tweeting that you should LIBERATE yourselves! That way he can have it both ways, that he’s been both on the side of helping you stay safe and on the side of helping restore you to work, when in fact he doesn’t give a shit about you. And since you can’t hold two ideas in your tiny little head simultaneously, you’ll believe him, both times.

So how does it feel? Must feel pretty bad, huh, to feel like you’re being treated the exact same way you treat women. Well, take heart, because pretty soon these are going to seem like the good old days. Because if you think this is bad, just wait until November.

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